How to deal with strange, subtle rude comments?
The best way to describe my brother-in-law is that he has a chip on his shoulder. He makes weird statements that I find incredibly rude and annoying but the stuff he says is so strange I'm not even sure how to call him out. Here's an example. I bought a new car. He said, "That's what all middle aged people do when they start to panic that they're getting old." For the record, it's not exactly a flashy sports car but I didn't say anything because I wasn't sure how to respond. Another day he saw me loading my kayak onto the car and he said, "Your life is even more boring that I thought. You think floating in a plastic boat is fun." If he were joking or just having fun, I'd be fine. But he says these things completely serious. He's not really a fun or funny person. Instead, it's mean spirited. But comments like this often drive me crazy for days as I'm thinking about what he meant or what I should have said for a comeback. Should I ignore his comments or speak up? And what would I even say?
How do I not feel sorry for someone else? I can't imagine that it's helpful.
My husband has a good friend whose wife visits me whenever our husbands are golfing or fishing or something. She isn't someone I would normally choose to be friends with but I see her often. I realized that I don't really like her. I just feel sorry for her. She is socially awkward and seems incredibly lonely. I've read your book 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do and I know it's bad to feel sorry for ourselves, but I can't help but think it's probably also unhealthy for us to feel bad for other people. How do you stop feeling sorry for someone else?
When to stop
Hi Amy So I have a problem which has been there for God knows how many years but I have realised it just now . I work as an actor and writer and my work brings me a lot of joy . Having said that , this line of work has its own set of challenges and frustrations like any other job does . There are deadlines to be met and there is pressure to perform . But I am not complaining because these are all ‘good problems’ to have . Now my issue is, since I enjoy my work I don’t know where to draw a line and stop. I keep working and then get exhausted for the everything else . The result is edginess and irritability which bleeds into other areas of my day. I have recently realised that by brain gets all exhausted and demands a relief which leads to this restlessness . I don’t know when to call it a day when it comes to my work. ( especially writing ) In one of your episodes you spoke about 10 min rules to get the momentum . I have tried it and it works like magic for so many things . I wanted to know if there is a time limit for the other side also ?? Are there any strategies to know that you ought to stop and take a break now ? What are the red flags to look out for ? Plz help .
Tips for coping with a breakup?
I have been through breakups before but this one feels different. I had thought we would eventually get married. Some things happened that we disagreed on and then we just couldn't come up with a plan or get on the same page for the future. She broke it off and I'm feeling heartbroken. I am not really interested in dating anyone else at the moment and I admit I keep checking to see what she is up to on social media. We agreed no contact was best but I'm struggling with that decision now. What can I do?
What to do about an adult child who isn't interested in joining the real world?
Our 28 year old son seems content to live in our basement forever. He plays video games all day, hangs out with his friends who are also dependent on their parents, and do nothing. We tell him to apply for jobs and he occasionally seems to put in a half hearted effort. We know we need to set boundaries with him but how do we do that now? He's been living with us for 4 years -- he went to college and briefly lived with roommates before coming back here. He originally moved in with us because of the pandemic but now he seems content to stay here forever. It's not good for any of us and we want to know how to set limits without just kicking him out. What do we do?